Mom's Out There

So here I am after a very long week. I have had so much of an experience that I could talk about it for ages. I'll just give you the short version in an email I sent my aunt.

~~~~~~~I think that it really freaked me out in general. But when they were giving me my spinal that is when I really started to freak. I started wondering why I was doing it and if it was the right thing. I was really excited to be awake but they saw how nervous I was so they kept on giving me relaxants.Then he cut me open and started yanking on things...that was the freakiest part. I told them I wanted to be put to sleep...the mental pictures I kept getting! It was just really weird being awake and having them cut you open. They said the whole surgery would be that way the pulling and tugging. So I went to sleep. I was upset about that...I really wanted to see my uterus.

When I woke up in recovery I couldn't believe the amount of pain! They started letting me push the morphine button (bad idea!) so there I was stoned out of my mind and then on top of it I started puking. So finally at night the nurses had enough because I wouldn't stay awake or breath they said, they took me off of it. I was sad but hey I was glad to be coherent after that!

I just can't get over the pain. You have to watch out how you move and what you do constantly. Last night at home sucked sleeping because I was flat...it felt like my stomach was ripping apart. I don't have very good drugs for at home because I didn't want them but I think I should have reconsidered.~~~~~~~~

But now the whole thing is over and I feel better.