Mom's Out There

I've been meaning to write this post for two weeks now...and finally have enough guts to go through with it. I have been a fan of Ghost Whisperer for awhile now...BUT...now the last couple of shows have been really hard to watch.

My grandfather died in December. I didn't get to go to his funeral because...well it was a family issue and I lived so far away. Anyways, I feel sometimes it's really not helped my grieving process. I still think my Opa is here, and when I think of something I wanna tell him and I go pick up the phone I have to remind myself that he isn't around anymore.

So now, Ghost Whisperer is back with the new shows. And now I am different. That show kills me every time I watch it. I cry and cry at the end when the loved ones get to hear a message from their loved ones. What I wouldn't do to get a message from my Opa...

My Opa (grandfather) died last night. He was in the hospital for almost a month now...but he has given up. He just gave up the fight. It is so weird because last night I was writing him a letter and it felt like I was talking to him directly. Then I find out he passed on last night. It is so weird. He was such a huge part of my life....he was like my dad. I wish I could have heard that lecture he gave me once again. I wish I could hear him say he loved me. I wish I could have given him a huge hug.